After realizing last week that I hadn't left the house in more than a week, I started fussing with God. (that's what my mom calls it: fussing) It's not that I am unhappy in my home and with these beautiful and amazing children so please don't misunderstand me. I love these children. I love that God trusts me with them. Even so, I found myself longing for the AC of my car and my music blasting through the radio as I drove through El Salvador. As I was praying I heard God's very still and quiet voice speak. He said "Be still, and know that I am God". It reminded me of Mia and me. Sitting in a waiting room and her being all wiggly and me saying to her "Be still." Relax. Wow. After I heard that I felt something inside that I couldn't quite put my finger on. It was a few days that I struggled with this. There is something that God is trying to teach me, but what?
I've been studying I Thessalonians for the past few weeks. If I have any type of Bible hero it is Paul. I love studying and learning about his life and ministry. I've been reading chapter by chapter verse by verse and am ever in awe of Paul. He was so humble; so obedient; so, so..... oh what's the word? That's what I needed to learn. I couldn't pin point the exact lesson God was trying to teach me.
Yesterday my amazingly wonderful husband took over all house hold duties for the morning (breakfast, homework, chores, helping Antonia with the tortilla business) and I went out to breakfast with a friend. We hadn't seen each other since November of last year! So as we were talking I started telling her about the mysterious lesson that I needed to learn. I struggled trying to explain it to her and out of her mouth popped one word: "reverence" Reverence! Honor God. don't complain to Him. Respect His word; don't sulk over it. Speak to Him in awe; don't fuss at Him. Honor Him with my obedience. It all just flooded my heart. I remember saying to her "God is not my homey, He's my King!"
I live a blessed life. I don't mean worldly blessed because y'all know this missionary is not getting rich until she enters the Kingdom of Heaven, but I am blessed! Loved! Cherished! Chosen! and I feel honored that God has trusted me with such a responsibility as His children. It's so, so important that we remember who God truly is. Yes, He calls us friend, but the Bible tells us that we must honor God. Seek Him in reverence and Obey Him with reverence. Hebrews 12:28 Therefore let us be grateful for receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, and thus let us offer to God acceptable worship, with reverence and awe.